I need an adult!

I hate chalkboards.

HATE them. Just looking at one makes me sick because I can’t stop (vividly) imagining dragging my fingernails across it. I’m sticking my tongue out right now I can’t even type about it without shuddering. 

So while they are useful and cute and look great in all the home decor idea photos…no. Not in my house. Not ever. 

See also: Flat paint. I’m throwing up. 

I pee often.

I freak out if I don’t have an absurdly large vessel of water within arm’s reach. Those XXL Gulp cups that hold a trash can of soda? Love those. But the condensation all over my desk???

Yeah it knows where it can go.

Things that are the worst.

Screaming apes and/or monkeys.

The noise. The bared gums. All of it. Just horrific.

I bet you could make the creative leap, but man oh man are these toys my nightmare.

Four seconds of this and I would tell the Soviets everything.